STEELER Report Card: A+

... but that's only if the "A" stands for "aggravating."

Or "annoying."

These are not the days are "A" is for Apple, "J" is for Jacks ... cinnamon toasty Apple Jacks ...

Although a big bowl of that sounds better than the big bowl of poop which the Steelers were scoopin' up vs. The Flavor of the Year (Bengal swirl on a sugar cone).

The only way this 3-0, 6-3, 6-6, 9-6, 9-9, 12-9, 12-12, 15-12, 18-12 annoying exercise in aggravation could've been more-aggravating or more-annoying would've been if somebody had put a gun to our heads and made us watch Berman & His Super-Schtick recap matters with: "And, after a 3-run homer by Willie Stargell gave Pittsburgh a 9-6 lead, 3-run homers by Tony Perez and Johnny Bench put Cincinnati ahead, 12-9."

The Cliffs Notes to this weirdness went something like: Roethlisberger scram 15 yds. to C 15 on first series (FG) ...

Consec. comps to Holmes 21 yds. to 15, 10 yds. 1st and goal at 5 (FG) ...

In succession: 46-yd PI, comps. to Moore for 11 to 19, Ward for 11 to 8 (FG) ...

QB sneak, FD at 11 (FG ... 12-12) ...

The only thing missing from the "inability to finish" showcase was what we saw in the game AT Cinshitnati: Limas Sweed dropping a TD pass which hit him right in the numbers as he was falling backwards (after falling on a banana peel ... or a garden rake ... whatever ...) ...

Actually, the winner of the Limas Sweed-stakes today occurred on the third play of the third qtr. when that pass bounced off of Ward's helmet and caromed to Frostee Rucker for the INT-runback/FG-setup.

For some reason, we're 'sposed to believe that the Bungles de Cinshitnati have that "deep-into-the-playoffs" look of a winner, thanks to Carson Palmer, an improved defense and the principles of Marvin Lewis.

But, let's remember this much: The only reason that Marvin Lewis wasn't fired after last season's 1-11-1 laughingstock before the 3-gm. win streak to end the season was -- as any Cinshitnatian will tell ya -- because upper mgmt. is too f-ing cheap to pay the remainder of Lewis' contract if he's axed.

Nuthin' magical 'bout that ...

And, until Carson Palmer wins a playoff game, they can cram that "changed the culture" B.S.

Nobody's scared of Payyyy-kohhh ...
Or Nuhhh-doooo-kwayy ...
Or Mowww-uhhh-looooga ...
Or Frosss-teee ...
Or Fuhh-nayyy-nayyy ...

AS PER THE BLACK N' GOLD, now is not the time for sorrow -- mostly because the remaining sked looks fairly-navigable in the Sea of 6-n'-3s (Pitt., N.E., S.D., Denv.).

The remaining menu of Chiefs, Raiders, Browns and Dolphins shows an extreme prejudice toward a 5-2 record in those games (4-3 at the very worst, considering the two Raven tussles and hard-to-figure Green Bay ... and, what the heck, maybe 6-1 if this team learns how to "close").

Seriously ... who sees more than 2 losses amongst that sorry group of NFL refuse?

Another shot at Cincy would be nice, given that Team Tiger Stripe scored two offensive TDs in 8 qtrs. vs. the Curtain.

Less than 2 mos. from now, the Steelers might be takin' their 10-6 record into Cincy and registering an unforgettable, 10-6 playoff win.

After Kimo von Oelhofen is activated for the game to re-enact the submarining of Palmer ...

b